WEK QUATORZE

SALTEE'S ! Hello boys & girls & everything in between. SW*BJ have had a WEK to remember, and if you've been following us on TWITTER, then you know just what we're talking ABOWT. Let's jump into the madness that is TWOBEWTS !

TWOBEWTS FESTAVULLS

Photo Credit: citylife.co.uk

BEESIDES the already UBER XSITING Coachella and The Big 4 festival, here are a low down on some of the HAWTESST shows u and your friends can DRANK and be merry to this sizzling summer. Stagecoach, in Indio California is your twang, heartbroken, dog on the porch KUNTRY show. Featuring the likes of Kenny Chesney, Carrie Underwood and classics like Loretta Lynn, be sure and mosey on over to the most toothless show on Earth. One of TWOBEWTS personal FAYVES, Glastonbury in the UK is where Prince William & Kate Middleton should honeymoon. Who needs castles right ? Headliners U2, Coldplay and the ever so preggers, Beyonce Beyonce (HEY!) will rock the stage. To catch the rest of the acts and festivals RAWKING your tookus well into the fall check out the LOWDOWN <<< right thurr.

TWOBEWTS FEWD

Photo Credit: createmychocolate.com

When we say CHA-GASMIC we mean it! Chocri is a create your own chocolate bar, JEANYUS idea by friends and co-owners Franz and Micah. What started OWT as a way to make the perfect gift for his girlfriend, Franz then got so many REKWEST'S that he and MIcah joined forces to bring us HEVIN wrapped in our most DEELISH toppings. From bourbon vanilla to chocolate sizzle rocks Chocri can do almost anything to make your special someone, or in SW*BJ's case, our own self loathing KALORY needs fulfilled in a easy to make online webpage order. Get to 'clicking' SNYTCHES, the bars run around $10 (with your choice of choclate and 5 toppings). Did we mention, you get to NAYME your bar, TWOBEWTS!

TWOBEWTS EDGEYEWKAYSHUN

Photo Credit: gianteagle.com

Ok HONAY BETCHES once in a while SW*BJ have to get into the serious matters, and when it comes to education and student loans, we're all feeling the HEDAYKES. With the economy in the quirky shape that it is, Upromise is a way to have those trusted people in your life (Mom, Dad, best friend, ex-lover, nanny, stalker) help you out in paying off your student loans & SAYVING themselves money. TWOBEWTS! It allows anyone to set up an account of their major credit or debit cards, and with money spent at countless retailers, restaurants, VACAYSHUN destinations and tons of other ways it donates a percentage toward helping you SALTEE'S pay off your student loans through Sallie Mae. Get to CLICKING

TWOBEWTS PHASHIONZ

Photo Credit: Terrance Stradford II

Do you get it yet? Literally a dead ass (donkey). TWOBEWTS! This clothing line is inspired by the sometimes too often used slang for "im serious." Creator, Terrance Stradford II is the INSPURASHUN behind this up and coming label and he sat down with TWOBEWTS to talk a bit about his thought process and where he sees "DeadA$$" going. 

TWOBEWTS- How did this idea come about for the clothing line?

Terrance- Since High school, I've always wanted my own clothing line. I grew up wanting to wear Bape, GShocks, Jordans, Louie V and all that good stuff, but I couldn't really afford it. I was the dude who bought the 5 different colored tees from FootAction for 20$ and made it last the whole year. When I got to College, I had to put a marketing plan together. During one of her classes I started sketching and for some reason or another I kept thinking of the word "DeadAss". I thought "Who made that the replacement word for seriously? And why a dead ass? That doesn't even make any sense!" Then I started to draw what I thought a Dead Ass would look like and as I finished I thought "This would make the DOPEST logo." As I got deeper into the project I began to realize that "DeadA$$" to me was like Bape and Milo to Nigo (the creator of Bape and those little Pharrell characters).

TWOBEWTS- Has the response been well received?

Terrance- Yeah! The reactions are exciting! Literally everyone who comes into contact with the logo (especially for the first time) reacts like "Dead Ass?... Deadass... OHHH [The "I just discovered something" laugh] I GET IT! IT'S A DEAD DONKEY! THATS DOPE!" That response makes me feel amazing! Mainly because the logo started off as just some random little sketch in my notes and now everyone thinks of my logo every time they say the word "DEADA$$."

TWOBEWTS- How far do you plan to go with it?

Terrance- As far as God has planned for me. I don't wanna stop at tees, I want to do hoodies, jackets, jeans, sneakers, backpacks, purses, sunglasses, watches. I want to make all the things I couldn't have when I was younger. I want to compete with the brands I gazed at growing up and the companies that inspired me in the development of "DeadA$$"! I want the artists and entertainers that I enjoy to be wearing my clothes and hitting me up before I drop the next design or product so they can be the first to wear it.

TWOBEWTS- What can we expect to see in the coming months?

Terrance- You can expect a webpage for online purchases, a couple more t-shirt designs based around the main character "DeadA$$," a hoodie for the fall/winter season and a comic is in development as well as a few more surprises I have in mind. Trust me! You'll love what I have in store for the future.

TWOBEWTS- What's your favorite TWOBEWTS part of doing this line?

Terrance- My Favorite TWOBEWTS part of doing this line is seeing peoples reactions when they get the shirt or even when they see a friend wearing it. I know that sounds "cheesy," but to be able to see people smiling or even laughing when they see my clothes and watching them say it over and over AND OVER as if I don't get the jokey cleverness of the design I created and also knowing that, it was MY creative idea and hard work that triggered that reaction is the dopest feeling... seriously... DEADA$$!

To stay up to DAYTE on all things DeadA$$, follow that little ass on TWITTER

SNYTCHES we have so much in store for next WEK, we almost want to write more, but we'll SAYVE the XSITEMINT for another PHUN filled episode of this LYFESTILE. Keep up to date with us on our TWITTER and make sure if you're in Toronto you're catching SW in The Lion King, or seeing BJ while on tour with Bon Jovi next WEK. So long our HONAY BETCHES 

XOSW*BJXO

WEK TRINAEST

SNYTCHES. HONAY BETCHES. OWR DVOATED FAHNZ! How may we ask are you!? We hope you've been NJOIng the weather if rain is what suits you cause mother nature is PISSD! While we have shopped for our FAYVE duds for Summer we will keep hope AHLYVE that the sun is coming. As we sip our KNEW Cocoa Cappuccino (to DYE for BTW) we XPLOUR this WEK's biggest and FEERCEst.

TWOBEWTS AHWARDS

Photo Credit: omusicawards.com

MTV is bringing us a new NVENTIV way to NJOI awards, celebrating and showcasing all things online from music with the "Open, Ongoing, and Online Music Awards." PEAKING a look at your FAYVE Tweets, Best Independent Music Blog, NSFW Music Video and much MOAR! Connect via your Facebook or Twitter, Vote and watch the awards Live online April 28th at 8PM PDT. TWOBEWTS connected, voted and will look to see if our girl Britney is voted "Fave F**k Yeah Tumblr." VOAT now!

TWOBEWTS BRAWDWAY

Photo Credit: musicnear.com

It is time to ROK BRAWDWAY SNYTCHES! For those of you who think that Broadway and Musical Theater is an old folks sport this musical will send you into a TYME warp showcasing a MUSAKK timeline of your life. If you're still holding onto your pair of STOAN wash jeans, red LETHER skirt and can of Aquanet hairpsray it's TYME to dust those bad boys off and HED over to see ROCK OF AGES!! After having to explain the "rules" to a few patrons who didn't understand that any show that serves Jello shots in the aisles during the show is not the show that is about the dialogue of "boy meets girl, boy loses girl, boy gets girl back." It's a kick ass show thanks to the music by 80's hair bands like White Snake and STYX. TWOBEWTS SHOWT OWT to the kids SKREAMING those hits, Rebecca Faulkenberry, Mig Ayesa and the TWOBEWTS lead Dan Domenech (who makes his B'way DAYBEW in this show). So TAYKE a shot on Broadway with a shot in hand. YAHHHS BETCH!

TWOBEWTS FEWD

Photo Credit: adrants.com

OMFG! Wafles & Dinges is a whimsical dream-like FEWD provided off a CHRAVULING truck, both full size and mini, in select NYC/Brooklyn LOWKASHUNS WEKly. The PHUN, quirky thing about them is you have to call their hotline or check their site to see where they'll be each WEK. Believe SW*BJ when we say its WURTH the hunt for just one bite of the wafle and spekuloos spread topping which will send your mouth into a dance of EPIK proportions. The best thing about all of this is the price, GRAYCIOUSLY cheap so you can add that cup of hot belgian cocoa. Find them on FACEBOOK, TWITTER, HOMEPAGE or call their hotline at 866-429-7329 for the location and password of the day!

TWOBEWTS MOOVIE

Photo Credit: onlinemovieshut.com

He's BAAAK! How we've missed our ghost faced menace. The Scream franchise has been one of our FAYVEs since childhood. In Junior High we SKREEMED with Drew Barrymore, in High school we feared going to college and getting hacked, and the third didn't fully deliver, BUTT Scream 4 was all of these and more! You could laugh at the things you knew would come (and producers seemed to welcome that), and the way ghosty stalks and creeps doesn't get old, EVUR! So needless to say you SNYTCHES should be OWT this WEKend jumping around like we did. Watch the trailer BEELOW and know that no place is SAYFE anymore. 

Video Credit: youtube.com

What a way to end the WEK. Scared and at the edge of peeing. Hope you don't mind. We suggest keeping up with us on TWITTER, grabbing a bite at Wafles, and catching a BRAWDWAY show with someone you trust because going home is a little off our path for the next PHEW days until the nightmares cease. Sincerely, your LYFESTILE guru's on everything TWOBEWTS! See you soon SALTEES.

XOSW*BJXO

WEK สิบสอง

When was the last time you had an OWTER body XPEERIENCE? We think we're having WUN right now. With all of YEW! 

TWOBEWTS PHASHIONZ

Photo Credit: cnnmoney.com via H&M (Penn Badgley)

H&M has brought us the Fashion Against AIDS campaign for the 4th KUNSEKUTIVE time highlighting a unisex line, where 25% of the proceeds go to HIV/AIDS AHWEARNESS and prevention. To date, H&M has raised $5.9 MILYUN with this campaign, TWOBEWTS! For as much good as the campaign does, many stylists digress using the line for it's look seems to be a flop with a boxy, nude feel. But what can you do when you're dressing a boy as a girl and a girl as a boy? This isn't Rocky Horror SNYTCHES. We'll be picking up our $3.99 condom set when the line launches in 150 stores on April 26th.

TWOBEWTS MUSAKK

Photo Credit: porcelainblack.com

When you see Alaina Beaton (a.k.a. Porcelain Black) you start to WUNDER, how did she get signed to Young Money's label helmed by Rap icon Lil' Wayne? A hard-edged rock Goddess in her own right Black has found a home with her R&B/Hip-Hop counterparts including Nicki Minaj and Drake, as well as currently opening for Weezy as part of his I Am Music II Tour. BJ had the chance to work alongside her on this tour and she's as tall and full of NERGEE as is her music. Opening the tour with her new hit "This Is What Rock N Roll Looks Like," she's larger than LYFE and is certainly among the TWOBEWTS family as one of our RAWNCHIEST glammed SNYTCHES ever! Get the FREE download of the WEK featuring her hit now and check out her FANSITE!

TWOBEWTS PHUN

Photo Credit: facebook.com/BeachPalooza

KAN SW*BJ and all our SALTEE SNYTCHES round the WURLD SAI YAHHHS BETCH! Beach Palooza is not your typical day at the beach. It's sun and surf, with LAWTS of beer, music and O yea, a KRAYZEE 5k obstacle course that is NOBEWTS difficult, but looks hysterically NTURTAYNING. Bring your friends, colleagues and a KAMURA to capture this insanity. Taking place in Boulder, Chicago, NYC, Galveston, Long Beach and Tampa place your sign up orders now and get your gear (includes a Beach Palooza tee, Pineapple hat, a race bib and a Mike's Harder Lemonade) TWOBEWTS!!! 

A day of sun, PHUN, friends, beer and live music , what more could a SNYTCH ask for?

TWOBEWTS FAYM!

Photo Credit: nickcannon.com

In the celeb driven society we live for, it's only fitting if you are FAYMUS for a day! For the starting price of apx. $600 you can WEEZLE yourself a few PAPARATSOZ, hounding your EVURY MOOVE as you trance around town running errands, getting your hair did or just sitting and NJOIng the LYMELITE. CELEB-4-A-DAY does all of this and more (depending on your deep pockets). For you REEL Celeb hounds in the L.A. area, take the Safari package, bringing you along with a real life PAPARATZO to find all the sex, sleeze and TWOBEWTS celeb dirt that US Magazine literally KILLZ for. In our opinion, BEE all you can be and go for it, have fun with it, TWOBEWTS!

All this talk of fame reminds us, we need to get our TWOBEWTS selves outta here and work on our own FAYME GAYME. We hope you HONAY BETCHES have NJOI'd your WEK of grammatical ERRURS and loose mouthed PHUN we create only for you SALTEES. See you on our TWITTER and of KOURSE we hope to meet you in person if you happen to see SW in The Lion King or BJ on the gritty streets of NYC. 

Lastly, in honor of rock legend Kurt Cobain, we will be playing Nirvana all WEK!

Ciao Cheers Näkemiin!

XOSW*BJXO